tentang tarikh ini.

22 April

kembali mengingatkan aku tentang nostalgia dulu. yang semestinya kalo dulu, aku cakap aku takkan lupakan sampai bile-bile, tapi arini, aku nak cakap yang aku belum lupa lagi. but i know, someday and somehow, it will fade away, as day goes by, as time passes by, and as i'm getting older. hehe:)

even sekarang, aku pon dah takde perasaan terhadap tarikh 22 April ni lagi kecuali hari lahir seorang junior yang aku sayang sesangat dari sekolah dulu. a very cute and lovely one.

aku malas nak membilang hari, tahun, dan bulan lagi bila sampainya ke tanggal arini. bagi aku, dah tak membawa apa-apa makna. huhu :) dah besar kan. benda-benda camtu zaman sekolah menengah dulu. and i know, this thing will somehow happen to me again. i will experience the feeling of love and to be loved again, it's just i don't know when, where, and how it happens. in a very funny way, or in a very unexpected way. but i don't want to think about it and get carried away with the idea of a prince charming will come, riding a white horse and knock my inside door and give salam. hahaha! mengarut. i have to quote this sentence as it belongs to inchek mohd faiz bin abas. he's so funny!

to reminisce the old primary school days, i couldn't recalled about me involved in any love nor crush thingy. hahaha! i know why. because i talked a lot and you know, pakai tudong pon senget-senget je. HUHU :) kalo tak caye, take a look at the pic. walaupon segan, tapi nak tunjuk jugak, something to share.

hahaha :) cuba laa teka mane satu aku kat dalam ni haa? kalo dah muka camtu kan, mane laa sape nak datang dekat. kakakaka! lawak la picture ni. sila klik untuk tumbesaran.

then, bila masuk sekolah menengah pon camtu jugak. nothing has changed except kitorang buat migrasi dalaman, berpindah dari bandar ke luar bandar. thou Kuala Terengganu belum lagi maju *ke?* dan mencapai tahap bandaraya seperti sekarang, it was near to the town. dari Kuala Terengganu yang pada mase tu still dalam kawasan majlis daerah pembandaran, pindah ke dalam daerah Marang, yang masa tu sangatlah teruk keadaanya *that was what i used to think, years ago*

i went to secondary school on my first day, without knowing anyone there. not even my neighbour, i knew no one. they were all total strangers. until someone talked to me while waiting for the bus *first time* to school. it was kak mira, who became my best friend forever. we became close and closer each day, even until now. uhhh how i miss talking to her.

then, dari situ la bermulanya kisah cinta aku dengan dia *bukan dengan kak mira, i'm straight ok! :)* haih. mase tu, rasanya aku macam budak sekolah yang baru nak kenal dunia kata orang tua. sangat setahun jagung. tapi dah gatal nak cuba menda alah segala ni.

huhu :) rasanya, ni je lah kot. sebabnya, aku dah penah cite pasal ni dulu, setahun yang lepas. tersimpan kemas dalam lipatan koleksi entry aku ni haa. panjang lebar penerangan kat situ. cumanya, masa yang aku tulis bercakap tentang hati ketika itu, dah berubah sekarang. mungkin dari segi perasaan, aku dah mula untuk belaja bersedia menerima perasaan orang lain terhadap aku, dan mengakui perasaan aku sendiri, bila dah sampai masanya nanti. bukan macam dulu, always in the state of denial.

aku tak salahkan dia atas yang terjadi, aku sebenarnya yang bermasalah dengan diri sendiri. takot tak bertempat. kalo macam ni la perangai kan, sampai bila-bila pon aku takkan belaja untuk buang perasaan takot tu. i should, i will and i am moving on. to the very next phase of my life. and i believe that you've done it long time ago :)

whatever it is, tarikh ni masih lagi mejadi kenangan dalam hidup aku. yang buat hidop aku jadi warna-warni macam kaler pelangi tu haa. kalo pon dah tak berperasaan bila 22 April datang, still, i remember as it was once, used to be a part of my life. the date that i used to wait, used to be very happy, used to feel like this whole world is mine. crappy crappy ain :P

and i believe, other people will do the same like what i am going to do. i knew some of my friends during uitm time who experienced break up in the middle of final exam, but they managed, with life and relationship in pieces, to move on, forget and live life as usual, even got a new replacement, a better one. congratulations! *clap clap* :)

lastly, happy birthday to my lovely sis, Saadatul Akma Md Zaid :)

jangan mengarut lagi, sila pegi mandi. oke, tu je! :)

it's me, little ain~